1. |
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I'm the Energy MC but I'm not MC Squared
I don't support nuclear, in fact it makes me scared
No, I'm MC Delta T, I'm so hot I AM heat
200 degrees is less than nothing to me
Don't call me Mr Fahrenheit, call me Miss Kelvin
Freddie lands on Mars with Marvin and Melvin
I use international system, coz that's how pros do it
- yeah, metres per second squared is my g-unit
(G-unit, drop it to tha flo)
I'm the energy master of your ceremonies
I'm hosting the death of the bourgeoisie
I control the mic, I don't drive but I bike
Have fun when your petrol sees another tax hike
You're a sucka mothafucka driving round the block
Looking for a sucka bitch to suck your cock
Well if you ask me I'll tell you where to stick it
Coz you're wasting gas and that's just not cricket
(You're sitting on chrome but you're all alone
There ain't no dog wanna eat your bone
You're driving so fast, it's a waste of gas
I'll pop a cap in yo ass, put your hands up...)
So I'm chillin in my crib with my homie King Hubbert
He says, “I think we've peaked and I don't really love it”
If we could turn back time there'd be an easy solution:
Cancel the industrial revolution
But the invention of a time machine is still pretty distant
The Great Leap Backwards can't be done in an instant
What we need to do is to make a transition
To a future of low energy and low emissions
So I'm writing rhymes about this day and time
And how everyone's only out to make a dime
You might say my songs have no worth
An 8 bar verse ain't gunna save the earth
But if my words make you stop and question
Why we do what we do then I've made an impression
So if you get offended by my radicalism
Remember I'm offended by capitalism
Ted Trainer called me up on the telephone today
He said, “Yo, waddup, I think we need a simpler way
Even if we're real efficient we're still energy deficient
All the world’s renewables can never be sufficient
To sustain the lifestyles that we're demanding
Are you understanding? We can't keep expanding!
Economic growth must be left behind
We need a whole new culture, a new state of mind”
The only way to alleviate my anxiety
Is to replace consumer capitalist society
If you don't know where to start, Rob Hopkins is da man
He'll help you write an Energy Descent Action Plan
Farms growing medicines, fuels, food and wood
People sharing skills, tools and cars in da hood
Friendly small communities just like the old times
Fuck the global corporations: LOCALISE!
MC Delta T layin down tha phat beatz
I'm so hot I am heat
mrs joyful in da house yo up in dis
Bangin dat gangsta shit
(Think Locally; Fuck Globally)
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2. |
mrs joyful - Boiler Lady
03:25
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I was on the prowl for a mistress
To take some of the chill off my winters
Took you home coz you looked cheap and easy
I didn’t know how much you would please me
You are the one who makes my blood bubble
But if I fall in you I'll be in hot trouble
You would never let me feel cold
But I fear that you're going to vapourise my soul
You're too hot to be an economiser
And you're too cool to be a superheater, baby
First you get wet, and then you get steamy
And that's why I call you my boiler lady
Oooh, I change state in you
Oooh, that's why I call you my boiler lady
For someone whose temperature doesn't change
Your turbulent behaviour seems strange
When you get on your Rankine cycle
You transform into a raging psycho
You're too hot to be an economiser
And you're too cool to be a superheater, baby
First you get wet, and then you get steamy
And that's why I call you my boiler lady
Oooh, fluid in your tubes
Oooh, that's why I call you my boiler lady
Your fuel bills are way through the roof
And you're fussy about what I put in you
If I penetrate you with hard water
We're gunna end up with a limescale daughter
You're high maintenance to the max
And you're always blowing shit out your stack
All that coal has made your heart black
And I need a whole room for you, you're so fat
Boiler lady, I found a new lover
She comes with a sign that says "do not cover"
I can turn her on with the flick of a switch
So good riddance to you, you carbon spewing bitch
You're too hot to be an economiser
And you're too cool to be a superheater, baby
First you get wet, and then you get steamy
And that's why I call you my boiler lady
Oooh, it's not me, it's you
Oooh, goodbye my darling boiler lady
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3. |
mrs joyful - Energy God
02:40
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Electricity flows from his fingertips and his breath makes windmills spin
His gaze is rays of golden sun and they'll burn you if you sin
But when he sees you mining coal he cries tears into hydro dams
He's the energy god of the land
It's his responsibility to supply all the energy
For earth and all that's heavenly for now and all eternity
He runs on his treadmill all day and when he runs it generates
And all the gods clap and say yay and turn on their laptops to play
He wishes he could stop to rest but it's his job, he'll do his best
Power sure makes gods feel blessed but how he wishes they'd use less
At least he looks good in a toga not that any ladies notice
They're too busy reading Vogue and heating rooms for bikram yoga
Electricity flows from his fingertips and his breath makes windmills spin
His gaze is rays of golden sun and they'll burn you if you sin
But when he sees you mining coal he cries tears into hydro dams
He's the energy god of the land
The people down on earth don't see they're using too much energy
And soon he thinks that maybe he will have a heart attack or three
If he drops dead on his feet the energy will fast deplete
And all the people there will bleat and mourn for all their wasted heat
He tries to send them subtle signs that he can't keep up with the times
Global warming gets denied and peak oil covered up with lies
But god is love and love is blind and though he knows his dear mankind
Will kill him one joule at a time for them he'd gladly bleed and die
Electricity flows from his fingertips and his breath makes windmills spin
His gaze is rays of golden sun and they'll burn you if you sin
But when he sees you mining coal he cries tears into hydro dams
He's the energy god of the land
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4. |
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Foxy lady!...
It drives me crazy
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Foxy lady...
There’s one thing you should know
It’s the only way to go
Please put out your paper
Recycle bottles when you can
Compost green waste as you need to
Reduce your waste - that is the plan
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Foxy lady...
There’s one thing you should know
Come on baby, here we go
Insulate your home now baby
Turn your lights off when not in use
Score your car some bio-diesel
A greener life is what I choose
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Foxy lady...
There's one thing you should know
Come on baby, here we go
With the trees cut down, oil wells drilling
Chainsaws rattling and the big boys chilling
Radiation flowing, deserts start snowing
World disasters, Fukishima’s glowing
Trees cut down, oil wells drilling
Chainsaws rattling and the big boys chilling
There's one thing you should know
It's the only way to go
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Planet says NO!
Foxy lady...
There’s one thing you should know
It’s the only way – let’s go!
And the planet says YEAH!...
Oooh aaah
Ride a bike or get out walking
Turn the TV off a while
Put your smoke butts in bins provided
And this should make the planet smile
Be kind to the earth, she's a foxy lady
The things that they’re doing, it drives me crazy
Future of the planet seems real hazy
Foxy lady, things seem shady
Trees cut down, oil wells drilling
Chainsaws rattling and the big boys chilling
There's one thing you should know
It's the only way to go
Planet says YEAH!
Planet says YEAH!
Planet says YEAH!
Foxy lady...
There’s one thing left to know
Hold on baby here we go
Foxy lady!...
Oh babe you drive me crazy
There’s one thing left to know
Come on baby, join the show!
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5. |
mrs joyful - 428
01:14
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6. |
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So your power bill's in and there's a frown on your face
But don't worry about it, coz I'm on the case
I'll track down all your vile energy thieves
Insulate your ceiling, and fix all your leaks
I'm hot on the trail of rogue heat escapees
Check your thermostat, watch me save your degrees
Change your showerhead, turn down your hot water
Then I'll save it by jumping in with your teenage daughter
Triple glaze your windows, turn off your lights
Don't leave your television on overnight
Out with your beer fridge, put it in the main fridge
If you got no room then put ice in your beverage
Ban the fan heater and get a heat pump
Don't degrade electricity to heat, you chump
I'm the energy detective
I'm the energy detective, yeah
I'm the energy detective, bitches and hoes
I'm the energy detective, yo
I don't just save your energy but money, too
Who's your retailer, how big is your fuse?
What plan are you on? Is it alright?
Would you use cheaper energy in the night?
If you wanna risk it and live on the edge
You can pay spot prices or maybe a hedge
I'll analyse your tariffs right down to the hour
Tell you the best time of day to take a shower
Don't turn everything on at one time
Your demand charge is an economic energy crime
I'm the energy detective
I'm the energy detective, yeah
I'm the energy detective, bitches and hoes
I'm the energy detective, yo
I like saving money but i love saving the earth
Without it we'd be dead so it's got maximum worth
So many motherfuckers just don't even care
That we're pumping out carbon into the air
They keep making coal plants and mining the ground
Driving V8s in circles round and round
I'll catch them and send them to energy jail
The things they have done are beyond the pale
So don't burn coal, it's real bad, not good
If you gotta burn something then i guess burn wood
But before you combust stop and think for a sec
Do you need this now or can you take a rain check
Make sure you're not doing anything shocking
When the energy police come a-knock-knock-knockin'
I'm the energy detective
I'm the energy detective, yeah
I'm the energy detective, bitches and hoes
I'm the energy detective, yo
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7. |
mrs joyful - Victoria
04:27
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If you're really that keen to be dead
Then take a bullet to your stupid head
If you're kind you'll shoot your children too
To save them suffering because of you
You're homical, suicidal
So sadistic, masochistic
It's our fate that you dictate
Please save us before it's too late
You've always got all the latest things
Living the lifestyle of a king
But that shit won't help you at last call
The higher you are the further you'll fall
You're so high in the society
Egotistic, not holistic
Deaf and dumb and blind and numb
You're living in an oil drum
You've got that smug look upon your face
As you kill the whole damn human race
Making orphans everywhere you go
Mass murder from the comfort of your home
You've got that smug look upon your face
As you kill the whole damn human race
Making orphans everywhere you go
Mass murder from the comfort of your home
You're homical, suicidal
So sadistic, masochistic
It's our fate that you dictate
Please save us before it's too late
So high in the society
Egotistic, not holistic
Deaf and dumb and blind and numb
You're living in an oil drum
With all the torture you've caused worldwide
I understand your grounds for suicide
But why'd you have to take me down as well?
You stupid bitch, I hope you go to hell
You're homical, suicidal
So sadistic, masochistic
It's our fate that you dictate
Please save us before it's too late
So high in the society
Egotistic, not holistic
Deaf and dumb and blind and numb
You're living in an oil drum
We’re drowning in an oil drum
We’re drowning in an oil drum
Look at what we’ve become
How could we be so dumb
We’re drowning in an oil drum
We're drowning in an oil drum
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8. |
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She don't ride no scooter
She don't drive no car
Coz she's walking the talk
And there ain't nowhere too far
She won't light no fire
She won't burn no coal
She says you know it ain't right
Keep the coal in the hole
Because she's so, because she's so, so solar
So she's got a tight ass from all that walking
It was difficult to meet her when I first started stalking
I asked her for a blow job but she don't eat meat
I love her compost toilet coz it flushes a treat
When I lick her hairy armpits then she sighs and groans
But it doesn't sound the same on the telephone
Her pussy has a bell to protect the birds
She doesn't do McDonald's to protect the herds
Because she's so, because she's so, so solar
She's got no chemicals
To spray on her vegetables
She cooks with organic
She's saving the planet
Her map of Tasmania
Grows wooly and wild
She don't use no hairspray
To keep that shit styled
Because she's so, because she's so, so solar
She released a battery chicken coz she's into finger lickin'
And she gets cross with the Japs when the whales they start a stickin'
So she did an occupation to protect the NZ nation
And she likes a crafty smoke when she enters an irration
She has a solar panel and she washes with a flannel
She doesn't like Fox news, she prefers another channel
She's one hell of a lover in her home spun pullover
With her ethical cotton she grinds until she's sodden
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9. |
mrs joyful - Heat Pump
03:57
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I was happy with my new lover
I wasn't looking out for another
But then you pumped yourself in my life
And now I want to make you my wife
The two of you both run off electricity
Which is great coz it can be made renewably
But that doesn't mean it is infinite or free
So I like that you use it more responsibly
It's cool she's got 100% efficiency
But your coefficient of performance is THREE
You give me more out than I put in
She was better than my ex but you're an obvious win
She can heat it but you can work it
She can make it but you can move it
She's one way but you reverse it
She can fake it but you can prove it
Heat pump, heat pump
You're my heat pump
Heat pump, heat pump
I love heat pump
If you want heat you can make it from electricity
But you can move more heat from the same quantity
It's all about the quality of your energy
Second law efficiency, entropy and exergy
So don't downgrade your high grade energy to low grade heat
Use it to move your heat carrying feet
You can even move it from a cooler to a hotter
I don't care if they say that you far better notter
She can heat it but you can work it
She can make it but you can move it
She's one way but you reverse it
She can fake it but you can prove it
Heat pump, heat pump
You're my heat pump
Heat pump, heat pump
I love heat pump
Sometimes it gets too hot in the summer
And that's where shes a bit of a bummer
She turns off
And illicit affairs with my fans
Leave me feeling unsatisfied, guilty and sad
But you can be my all pleasing girl for all seasons
If I'm hot or I'm cold you fulfil all my needs and
You're totally cooler than the fans were too
There's no catch with you, you're too good to be true
She can heat it but you can work it
She can make it but you can move it
She's one way but you reverse it
She can fake it but you can prove it
Heat pump, heat pump
You're my heat pump
Heat pump, heat pump
I love heat pump
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10. |
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It's restricted
I'm conflicted
I'm addicted
To dinosaurs
White line picket
I can't kick it
I'm addicted
I just want more
See I'm tripping again, feel that rush in my veins
As I'm hooning in race cars and jetting in planes
But as I am flying and feeling this high
I am also aware that climate change and peak oil are nigh
It's a bad dirty fuel habit
Don't make me give it up or I'll go manic
If it's fossil fuel I don't care if it's cut - I'll have it
It's a bad dirty fuel habit
Dead dinosaurs rotting under the earth
Did they ever have a clue how much they'd be worth?
Fuel and plastic - it's fantastic!
No I'm not being sarcastic
Though they're really great inventions
It's time for an intervention
Let us practice fuel abstention
Turn off your combustion engines
The party was great but now it's over
We're going to have to learn to live sober
It's restricted
I'm conflicted
I'm addicted
To dinosaurs
White line picket
I can't kick it
I'm addicted
I just want more
I try to stick to the green and turn down all the rest
Of the junk that they say is meant to impress
But sometimes I need a hit and then I go and inject
Money into the oil economy and the greenhouse effect
It's a bad dirty fuel habit
Don't make me give it up or I'll go manic
If it's fossil fuel I don't care if it's cut - I'll have it
It's a bad dirty fuel habit
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mrs joyful Dunedin, New Zealand
- mrs joyful - geriatric art punk -
rafia work enthusiast
dubious speler and
grammarer
- MC Delta T - Little Girl Nerdcore -
Pretty fly for a physicist
Bears an uncanny resemblance to mrs joyful
- Kill, Martha - Hardkohr Manchester Ukulele Gangsta Crack -
From the suitcase on the left she took her favourite axe.
The voice was clearer now: Kill, Martha!
... more
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